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Long live all maidens

easy and beautiful !

Long live mature women also,

Tender and loveable and full of good labor. 

Gaudeamus Igitur

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And so ...


Hi Adria, 

Here we are in February! So much has happened since Christmas that it seems unreal. All those promises to try and live a fuller life with less stress were certainly put on hold during January. Also, let me apologize for being totally absent from all communication this past week. I felt so frustrated not having time to do the things I love (even missing Monday’s class), but life has a strange way of re-directing priorities.

Thank you for your condolences and please accept mine on the death of your cousin. Our lives (yours and mine) are so full of – I don’t want to say coincidences, as this is not forceful enough – uncanny, serendipitous moments and events.  

Death, literally and brutally (my Aunt would probably add, finally), put an end to the life she had given up so long ago. I was in my 20’s when she came to live with us, (my Mother was her oldest sister. I think all my aunts, at one time or another came to live with us.) Totally self absorbed at the time, I really did not pay much attention to the circumstances. Eventually, my mother told me about Aunt M’s husband: the man who routinely gave her large amounts of money to do with as she pleased, the man who bought her expensive, stunning jewellery, and the man who cared nothing about her. He had had a long line of mistresses and finally asked my Aunt to leave and soon he was threatening her. It is amazing how he could just throw her out like that. She was probably in her mid-thirties or early forties at the time, (very peculiar what happens with time - the relativity of it - when I was young, she was just an older aunt. Then last week when she died, she was only a decade and a half older than me). As I‘ve mentioned before, she never recovered from the divorce and drank heavily for quite a few years, becoming a total recluse. So when I heard the priest, babbling on about how she loved life, I wanted to yell out, there is something wrong with misrepresenting the dead!   

Still on the subject of death, I am collecting all the articles on Salinger. My students are usually infatuated with his reclusive lifestyle - something kids of this tell-all-every-minute-generation do not understand. Ironically, I was not there to invigilate, and they wrote their exam (with a part on Catcher in the Rye) on the day of his death. Not sure if they realize even now that he died. Following the news, other than celebrity news, is not high on their list of priorities.

I wonder if we can meet early on Monday before class to talk about your memoir piece, A Matter of Choice. Such superb lines - he was her lover, her butler (so original) and gardener   … her vanity is incurable … how can you ask me to wear shoes like that?  It is a quintessential question as we age. Why are you asking me to give up …  Gonnie is all of us! Bravo, Adria. You have to read this to the class for sure!

 I can’t wait to hear what happened last week. 


And so ...  Sarah


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